


Look at me

by nonbinarytaemin



Category: Topp Dogg (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Everyone's a girl, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-09
Updated: 2016-01-09
Packaged: 2018-05-12 13:22:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5667568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nonbinarytaemin/pseuds/nonbinarytaemin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hansol is distracting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Look at me

Art is the only class where Byungjoo and Hansol can't sit together. Byungjoo had switched in late, and by that time Hansol had already surrounded herself with a table of friends, so Byungjoo was confined to the back corner with Sangwon and Sanggyun. Hansol shot her an apologetic look over Jiho's shoulder on the first day, but lately Byungjoo finds herself looking forward to the class, to some time she can spend thinking about something other than her best friend.

Byungjoo might try to pretend otherwise, but Hansol is distracting. She's been distracting ever since the first day they had class together, when Byungjoo caught herself noticing the crinkle of Hansol's eyes when she smiled, the movement of her legs crossing - things she never paid attention to in other girls.

Byungjoo had tried, for awhile, not to pay attention to Hansol either. She'd tried making other friends, but soon she learned these efforts were in vain. Upperclassmen or underclassmen, everyone seemed to know Hansol, and it was only a matter of time before Hansol introduced herself, putting her front and center in Byungjoo's thoughts.

She'd chalked the whole thing up to Hansol's weird charm at first. Hansol was pretty, by anyone's standards, and she had a way of making people pay attention to her, even without trying. Hansol had pulled Byungjoo in all too easily, and invitations to sit beside her in math gave way to visiting each other's houses, walking home together, sleepovers. Soon Hansol was just a part of daily life. Even Byungjoo's mother liked her, and Byungjoo told herself that it was fine, that the tug in her chest when Hansol laughed at her joke or smiled at her for more than a split second was fine.

And everything _was_ fine. For a while.

Until Hansol started noticing Byungjoo as well.

Hansol is affectionate with all her friends, to say the least. It's not uncommon to find her sitting in Dongsung's lap in the morning before classes started, or linking arms with Jiho in the hallways. But with Byungjoo she's been relentless. She insists on holding hands at the lunch table, walking home with her arms draped over Byungjoo's shoulders, playing with Byungjoo's hair while she talked and then laughing when Byungjoo lost track of her sentences.

"Byungjoo!"

Byungjoo's head shoots up from her paper, and she pushes aside thoughts of fingers running through her hair. "What?"

Sanggyun snickers at her. "You look like you weren't paying attention."

"I wasn't," Byungjoo admits. "What are we doing?"

Sangwon rolls her eyes. "We're supposed to do portraits of each other," Sanggyun says. "So we're switching seats."

"Oh." Byungjoo blinks down at her blank sketchbook, still somewhat lost. "Okay? Where am I going?"

"You can stay there," Hansol says, tapping Byungjoo on the shoulder as she walks past. Byungjoo nearly jumps out of her skin as Hansol smoothes out her skirt and settles into the chair across from her. "There's too many people at our table," she continues when Byungjoo just looks blankly at her. "So I'm drawing you instead."

_Shit._

"Alright," Byungjoo says, forcing a grin. Hansol scoots her chair a bit closer and takes out her sketchbook. Byungjoo follows suit, and spends the rest of the period pretending she isn't paying attention to Hansol playing with her hand under the table.

 

 

Being forced to look at Hansol for 50 minutes a day turns out to be the worst thing to have happened to Byungjoo's art grade. At the end of the week she's barely made any progress, and Hansol is berating her for not having worked harder on a project due next Monday.

Byungjoo just isn't very good at drawing Hansol, that's all. It's not that she hasn't been working on it, she tells herself.

(It is, though - too much of her time has been spent simply staring at Hansol, watching the way her bangs fall over her face or the shadow of her cheekbones while she works until she looks up and meets Byungjoo's gaze, and Byungjoo is forced to look away again, red faced.)

But having her Hansol-free period taken away definitely hasn't affected her outside of class. It definitely hasn't made the weird feeling in her chest whenever Hansol's around any worse. It definitely hasn't made her shy away from Hansol more and more frequently, leaning away from the touches, pushing away her hugs just to have some space to think.

Byungjoo just wants some time to herself. That's all. The way Hansol makes her feel just isn't something she wants to touch, not now. It's something too new and strange and somehow exciting for her to deal with on top of classes and homework and her parents.

So she doesn't.

And she pretends she doesn't care about the looks Hansol's been giving her, confusion giving way to hurt when Byungjoo says _Sorry, I can't walk home with you today_ , when she bats away Hansol's hands. She doesn't care that their conversations are growing shorter, colder.

But Hansol won't let her turn down the offer to stay after school on Friday to finish the portrait. "You're gonna fail the project otherwise," Hansol chides, shooting down Byungjoo's weak protests.

"You don't have to stay with me, though," Byungjoo says carefully, gauging how much she can push without upsetting Hansol more. "I can just get a picture of you, or - "

"It's fine!" Hansol waves her words away again, before reaching out to rest a hand on Byungjoo's shoulder. "If I'm there you won't get lonely," she says with a grin. And this is where Byungjoo knows Hansol wants her response, wants Byungjoo's affection in turn.

Byungjoo just nods, turning away so she doesn't have to watch the smile slip from Hansol's face.

 

 

Byungjoo drops her bag three times on the way up to the art room, and she thinks maybe she should have taken that as a bad omen. Hansol's already waiting for her, books spread out across the table. "Is it okay if I study while we do this?" Hansol asks. "There's supposed to be a history quiz on Monday."

"That's fine," Byungjoo says, feeling some of her nervousness lifting. Maybe they can pass the next hour in relative silence, and once Byungjoo's art project is finished she can leave this week behind her.

Studying, however, turns out to be Hansol reading their history book out loud, making offhand comments about old war generals, and expecting Byungjoo to laugh. And between her art project, the onslaught of history facts, and the glittery lip gloss Hansol is wearing today, Byungjoo finds it much easier to spend nearly 15 minutes just staring at her best friend.

For the first time in awhile, she lets her eyes trail over the soft skin of Hansol's neck, up to her lips when she draws her tongue across them in concentration. Byungjoo lets herself wonder what her lip gloss tastes like, if her lips would be as soft as they look. Hansol rests her chin on her hand, leaning down over her book, and Byungjoo imagines her long eyelashes fluttering closed, lips parted -

"Byungjoo?"

Byungjoo nearly throws her pencil in alarm. Hansol is looking at her, head titled questioningly. "What do you want?" she asks, smirking, and it's only then that Byungjoo realizes Hansol noticed her staring .

"No, I was just- " Byungjoo starts, stops, shakes her head when Hansol's smile grows wider, and damn it, she can't think with Hansol staring at her like that. "I just need to...bathroom-"

And before she can even finish the sentence Byungjoo is on her feet, making a dash for the door even as she hears the scrape of Hansol's chair behind her.

"Byungjoo!" she calls, and Byungjoo barely makes it out the door before Hansol grabs hold of her wrist, spinning her around again.

"What is up with you?" Hansol asks, voice rising dangerously. But they're alone in the hallway. Even the teachers had locked up for the night, and there's nothing to distract Byungjoo from Hansol's furrowed brow. "Are you mad at me or something?"

"What - no, of course not!" Byungjoo says. Hansol lets her wrist drop.

"What's going on, then?" Hansol asks. "You're so...do you just not like me hugging you in public and stuff? Because I can stop-"

"No," Byungjoo says, so quickly that Hansol almost laughs and she feels a blush creeping up her cheeks. "No, it's just...I don't know, I've been seeing you a lot lately, and I guess..."

"...do you not want me around as much? Is that what this is?" Hansol asks, and she's frowning at Byungjoo again, and she's hurt, Byungjoo knows, but she can't seem to find words to make this any better.

"I just don't - I don't want to have to think about you all the time."

"...oh," Hansol takes a half step back, and immediately Byungjoo can see by the look on her face that she said the wrong thing. Again.

"No! God, that's not what I meant, I just...having you around all the time is really...I just keep thinking about you and it gets really distracting and - "

Byungjoo's floundering, but she can see something dawning on Hansol's face, and she raises an eyebrow that has Byungjoo falling silent in an instant. "So you think about me too much?" she asks.

"Uh..."

Hansol steps closer again, a half-smile quirking her lips, and she's really too close now, Byungjoo thinks, close enough to take her hand and lace their fingers together. Hansol smells like vanilla shampoo and Byungjoo's brain can't really process much beyond that.

"Do you like me?" Hansol says, entirely too matter-of-factly for Byungjoo's taste.

"Uh," Byungjoo says again, and Hansol giggles. Her gaze drifts down, and Byungjoo finds her own eyes drawn to Hansol's mouth when she licks her lips.

"Well," she says quietly, "Do you ever think about kissing me?"

And Byungjoo's brain must not be working anymore, because she says, "Yeah," and then Hansol is bringing a hand up to Byungjoo's cheek and leaning in towards her and _oh my god._

Hansol's lip gloss is sticky, and it doesn't taste like much of anything, but her lips are soft and so much warmer than Byungjoo expected and her thumb is tracing little circles on Byungjoo's cheek. Byungjoo lets her eyes slip closed, opens her mouth to kiss Hansol back, and Hansol makes a small, pleased sound that nearly makes Byungjoo's knees give out. Hansol kisses her so slowly, so carefully, like she's afraid Byungjoo's going to pull away again. Byungjoo's arms are stiff at her sides, but she brings them up to Hansol's shoulders, tries to let her know that she's not going anywhere.

"Was that so hard?" Hansol asks against her lips when they break apart.

And Byungjoo doesn't know, she still can't form a coherent thought, but for once she finds she's not worried about that. "Um," she says helpfully. "Can you just...again - "

Hansol laughs breathlessly and kisses her again before she can finish.

 

 

Byungjoo gets a D+ on her art project. Hansol is thoroughly exasperated, but Byungjoo figures it was worth it.

**Author's Note:**

> does anyone even like topp dogg anymore? haha (me laughing but with tears on my face)
> 
> i'm honestly not that happy with this but there just aren't enough gay girl fics out there so i have to contribute what i can.


End file.
